Stores like Fred Meyer sell drugs to deal with menstrual cramps, such as Pamprin and Midol. Though consuming these drugs created by male-bodied people may lead to relief in the present, I have found long-term negative consequences when taking these drugs. For example, if I have my period one month and take Pamprin to relieve cramps, then the next month I have to take twice as much pamprin to deal with the same amount of cramps. If I decide I don't want to take male-bodied person made chemicals to relieve my cramps, this is a problem. The cramps get worse because of withdrawl symptoms from the drug, and it may take months for them to return to normal.
Once I stole a tincture of Cramp Bark from a popular health food chain on Burnside. Cramp Bark is an alternative that some use to relieve menstrual cramps. However, these tinctures are often very expensive for radicals to purchase them, so the bourgeosie are most often the people who benefit from cramp bark tinctures. When I stole it, it didn't work at all anyway though. I'm not sure how much I actually buy into the effectiveness of tinctures. Part of me believes it to be bullshit.
So, what is a skeptical atheist radical who hates drugs made by male-bodied people to do? Here is a list of activities I've found that help relieve menstrual cramps that can be done in the Portland area for free. Please add to the list in the comments section for more suggestions:
Masturbate or have sex-- orgasms and muscle movements in my uterus relieve cramps.
Go for a walk up a hill-- again, muscles moving help relieve cramps for some reason. hills help this more than flat land.
yell at people who are oppressing others-- it relieves uterine menstral cramps to yell at people wearing fur, saying sexist things or racist things.
petty theft-- sometimes I need to wear a tampon instead of cloth pads. petty theft of tampons from chain stores makes me feel like I'm doing my part to tear down the capitalist machine, and I think tampons should be free anyway. The rush of adreneline throughout the body brings relief to the uterine cramps.