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Fun with George Bush

Just watch the animation
Just look at the fear in his eyes.
You want even more fun? This one has added stress relief! 16.Dec.2005 15:39

Dan


And now....... 17.Dec.2005 15:00

twospiritwarrior

Outsourcing the Presidency

The U.S. Congress announced today that the office of the President of the United States of America will be outsourced to India on January 26, 2006.
The Government Accounting Office, along with Congressman Thomas Reynolds (R) said the move is being done to save the taxpayers $400,000 a year, as well as the $521 billion deficit George Bush has run up in five years.

"I think this is the best thing to do because of the enormous savings to the American public" said Reynolds, "because America will not be able to remain competitive on the world market with the current level of federal spending. The plans for this outsourcing have been underway for several months."
George Bush was informed of his termination this morning by e-mail.

Gurvindar Singh, an employee of Teleservices, Mumbai, India, will be sworn in as President on January 21, 2006.
"Gurvindar Singh was born in America while his mother and father were vacationing in Las Vegas" said Reynolds, so he is eligible to assume the presidential position." The government accounting office said that Mr. Singh will be paid $4,000US a year, but will have no medical coverage or other
benefits. "We expect Mr. Singh to handle the duties of the President without any support staff" said a GAO spokeswoman.

Because of the time difference between India and the U.S., Singh will be working at night, when other U.S. government offices are closed.
"I am very excited, and I will be able to continue working my day job at the American Express office" said Singh during an exclusive interview with Wolf Blitzer in the Situation Room.
"I have always dreamed of becoming President of the United States" he said.

An anonymous government official said that it would not be a problem if Mr. Singh was not totally aware of the issues a President must deal with because George Bush was not familiar with the issues either. "President Singh will use scripted speeches which will help him deal with issues, and teleprompting. We know this will work because Bush was successful at it for years."

George Bush will continue to receive health coverage, expenses, and salary
until January 26. After a two week waiting period, Bush will be eligible for $240 a week for 13 weeks of unemployment insurance.However, he will not be eligible for Medicare, as his unemployment benefits will exceed the allowed
limit.

George Bush was recommended to Manpower Inc., for employment possibilities, resume writing, and to prepare for his job transition. However, the Manpower office said that Mr. Bush will face problems finding new work because of his limited work experience.

Manpower Inc. made the following job recommendations for him:
A Doorman/Greeter job at Wal-Mart because of Bush's experience in shaking
hands, kissing babies, and smiling.

Re-enlisting in the Texas Air National Guard. His service record is currently
unavailable. If he chooses to re-enlist, he will train at Ft.Hood before being
sent to Iraq.He has visited Iraq earlier.
"I have visited Iraq, and I know all about it" said Mr. Bush on Larry King Live.
"I have learned lots of things, like in my tour of the airport and the gift shop, and the safety of the Green Zone."

Reliable sources in Baghdad, Falluja, and Tikrit said George Bush will receive a very warm reception from local Iraqis. They will be notified of the details of his arrival so that they can arrange a most appropriate welcome.