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Guns & Dope Party: Everybody for President

-- Well, at least everybody who feels ready for the
responsibility of self-goverment. Those who still
need a Big Daddy or a Big Momma to discipline and
dominate them should vote for whatever furhrer or
saviour they like best.
If you want self-government don't vote for the Two
Lying Bastards of the Democan and Republicrat parties.....
or for any minority party that also wants to govern you....
Like what you like
Like what you like
We advocate
[1] guns for those who want them, no guns forced on those who don't want them (pacfists, Quakers etc.)
[2] drugs for those who want them, no drugs forced on those who don't want them (Christian Scientists etc.)
[3] an end to Tsarism and a return to constitutional democracy
[4] equal rights for ostriches.

To the States or any one of them, or any city of the States:
Once unquestioning obedience, once fully enslaved,
Once fully enslaved, no nation, state, city of this Earth,
ever afterward resumes its liberty.
-- Walt Whitman

Do not annoy people at home.
Do not pester them at work.
Leave them alone, or they will curse you.
-- Lao-Tsu

Government is not reason, it is not eloquence, it is force; like fire, a troublesome servant and a fearful master. Never for a moment should it be left to irresponsible action.
-- George Washington

homepage: homepage: http://www.gunsanddope.com/

RA Wilson on Guns and Dope 27.Sep.2004 15:28

a tsar

My party, the Guns and Dope Party, invites extremists of both right and left to unite behind our shared goals of:

1. Get those pointy-headed Washington bureaucrats off our backs and off our fronts too!

2. Guns for everybody who wants them; no guns for those who don't want them

3. Drugs for everybody who wants them; no drugs for those who don't want them

4. Freedom of choice, free love,free speech, free Internet and free beer

5. California secession -- Keep the anti-gun and ant-dope fanatics on the Eastern side of the Rockies

6. Lotsa wild parties every night by gun-toting dopers

7. Animal protection -- Support your right to keep and arm bears

More position papers will follow; we know at least 69 good positions.

POSITION PAPER 5 27.Sep.2004 15:30

a tsar

Major goal of first term: California secesion. [Oregon, Washington State and B.C. invited to join Freetopia....]

First order of business on assuming office: Fire 33% of the legislature [names selected at random] and replace them with full-grown adult ostriches, whose mysterious and awesome dignity will elevate the suidean barbarity long established there.

Both the pro-gun people and the dopers [medical, religious and/or receational] feel like minorities, and the TSOG [Tsarist Occupation Government] agrees with this estimate of their weakness. Our contention holds that in California both groups woikin' together make a MAJORITY. Ergo, they have much to gain and nowt to lose in combining forces. Each side only has to realize this and agree "We'll tolerate their hobbies if they'll tolerate ours" and we can even beat Schwarzenegger!

GOD AND TSARDOM 27.Sep.2004 15:33

a tsar

Tsarism represents an intermediate form between European monarchism and Asian despotism, being, possibly, closer to the latter of these two.
-- Leon Trotsky, Russia's Social Development and Tsarism

The Guns & Dope Party wants to abolish Tsarism and restore constitutional democracy in the California Republic. If our example inspires the other 49 states, so much the better.

Why do we oppose Tsarism? How does the U.S. drug Tsar function?

Allegedly, this omniscient official knows what drugs, herbs ,compounds etc. you should use for your medical problems better than your doctor knows!!!!!! Even more magically, the Tsar knows this without doing any physical examination of you, blood pressure readings, other scientific tests etc. that your doctor does, and often from a distance of 3000 miles -- and the Tsar does it without even looking at you. The Tsar doesn't even know if you have hangnail or cancer, AIDS or flu, belong to the senior set or haven't even reached voting age yet. He can't even classify you as male, female or undecided.

In short, the Tsar knows nothing about you or your medical problems, by ordinary data, but he still know more about your medical care than your doctor knows, by some supernatural means unknown to mere mortals.

This makes sense if and only if we have a devout faith that our Tsar, like the Russian Tsars of olde, recives guidance directly from "God." No other,less spooky explanation fits the claims made by Tsardom.

The government accordingly spends more and more of our tax money financing "faith-based organizations." Without faith we might relapse into scientific or rational thinking, which leads by a slippery slope toward constitutional democracy.

Guns and Dope are similar issues! 27.Sep.2004 18:13


The NRA could teach some very useful lessons to the drug freedom movement. Their arguments for freedom of gun ownership translate with a little word substitution to excellent arguements for freedom to be high.