portland independent media center  
images audio video
newswire article commentary global

government | media criticism

Truth or fiction

"News" about Iraq
AP Newswire, March 15th

Bill Tindale Reporting

Washington D.C.- In the rememberance of Freedom Fries, the renaming of French fries in all Capitol Hill restaurants, House Majority leader Tom Delay R-OK, today introduced a bill to rename anything in Capitol Hill restaurants with the 'Spanish, or Spain' moniker. The bill, said to be heavily supported by the White House, and a teaming of The Christian Coalition and the Ku Klux Klan, is expected to pass on mostly party lines.

"We need to send a clear message to Spain. We need to let them know that a democracy always supports the US." said a representative for Mr. Delay.

White House spokesman Scott McLellan also commented on the bill, "The Spanish people need to know that they voted entirely wrong. The President feels it is the duty of America, as a leading democracy, to inform other countries how to vote. He disagrees with a Socialist government."

Vice President Dick Cheney, appearing on 'The O'Reilly Factor', joked with Bill O'Reilly that he'd, "never again drink Socialist Coffee, or eat Socialist Omelettes." When O'Reilly informed him that 'omelette' is a French word the Vice President responded, ".......well then I'm not eating any damned Freedom Style Socialist Eggs!"

Columnist Ann Coulter, appearing on Joe Scarborough's 'Scarborough Country,' implored "every decent, hard working American to kill every Socialist in the world, including the liberal traitors in our own country, to save the world from utter disaster." She continued, "This Bill in the House doesn't go far enough. We must kill everyone who is supporting terrorists, like the Socialists in Spain." She added, "We have concrete Intelligence reports that it was the Socialist Party in Spain that bombed the trains in Madrid. That's what Socialists do, they kill anyone to get more power."

Later in the day, President Bush was asked about the comments made by Prime Minister-elect Jose Zapatero, he responded, "Well, I've read..........uhhhh.............the Unabomber Manifesto........and...........I don't think that aaaaaaaaa.........................Socialist government like those in the Middle East countries.................would be safe for our democracy.........for the freedoms we have...... The Socialists in Iraq want to..........want to destroy our freedoms......take away our freedoms.....................scare us into................. They want to kill everyone......death is their only goal.......and..........God wants me to stop them. I'll stop them. ...........just like....the terrorists of 9/11.....who're now in jail in Bhagdad....."
Sorry, but this is bogus 19.Mar.2004 09:31

tsalagi red

and if it was an attempt at satire, it is way too close to the truth to be funny!

yes, it is fiction 19.Mar.2004 09:52

D

For anything to be funny, it has to be partly true.

lol 19.Mar.2004 09:54

Jimminy Cricket

like the Bush quote. I swear, if you play him in fast forward, he'd sound like Porky Pig!

and if 20.Mar.2004 03:28

you play him backwards

you can hear satanic messages