Fellow citizens. I think today my Admin'stration and you on the Left have a common goal, and I think you know what that goal is. I ask you, citizens of the Left, to help me in sabotagin' the John Kerry Campaign. Tell ya what I'm gonna do. You guys like to protest, right? Well I'll promise you 4 more years of all kind a stuff you can protest about: more war, more pollution, less jobs, you name it.|
This Kerry guy is bad news....but don't forget he's just like me. So what if he was a leading member of Vietnam Veterans Against the War, So what if he's the Senate's top Environmentalist, So what if he led the Iran-Contra Investigation, so what if he opposed the Gulf War and led the BCCI investigation. He's just like me. Yes, he SAYS he wants peace, he SAYS he wants a hydrogen economy...but you can't trust them Massachewsits Lib'rals anyhow.
So here's what you guys should do: vote for a 3rd party, and I'll take care of the rest. I'll sabotage him from the Right and you from the Left and we'll have ourselves a ball in 2005-08. Hey if you elect Kerry you won't have Dubya, Cheney, Rumsfeld, Rove, Pearl, Wolfowitz, and Ashcroft to kick around anymore. So come on guys, I'll give you 4 more years of fun things to protest about; just keep doing what your doing opposin' this guy Kerry, and we'll both get what we want. And you can even keep talking about the JFK assassination, you know, how it was a coup an' all, and you won't have to worry about putting someone more Progressive than JFK in the White House. You can just keep protesting me...don't worry, I won't mind. So we got ourselves a deal?