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"FCC to investigate Super Bowl breast-baring" (CNN.com)

"Like millions of Americans, my family and I gathered around the television for a celebration," FCC Chairman Michael Powell said in a statement. "Instead, that celebration was tainted by a classless, crass and deplorable stunt. Our nation's children, parents and citizens deserve better.

"I have instructed the commission to open an immediate investigation into last night's broadcast. Our investigation will be thorough and swift.
 http://www.cnn.com/2004/US/02/02/superbowl.jackson/index.html

I, for one, am absolutely indebted to Michael Powell for acting speedily on this most pressing of global issues. Not since Ralph Nader called for an independent inquiry into the Lakers' game six victory over the Sacramento Kings ( http://espn.go.com/nba/playoffs2002/s/2002/0605/1390908.html) has our nation experienced such a crisis of almost Gingrichian proportions.

One hopes that the so-called independent investigation on 9/11 and the prosecution of Enron executives may be immediately abandoned so that the feds may devote all necessary resources to ferreting out the truth behind Janet Jackson's naked breast.

Colin Powell, Michael's father, is expected to address the United Nations later in the week on this very issue.

Stay tuned to CNN for any late-breaking updates on this story.

New lows 02.Feb.2004 16:20

pp

Just when I thought it couldn't sink any lower...

Oh Mr. Powell, thank you for taking such a deep interest in the well being of the citizens of this country. I'm so glad you're there to protect me from seeing nipple. Hmm. maybe if Tom Hicks and Rupert Murdock showed a little skin, you might slap their hands? oh, of course not, those are the hands that feed you ... and feed you .... and feed you.

Where's ARNIE 02.Feb.2004 16:31

when ya need 'im?

;-)

Crazy Hypocrisy 02.Feb.2004 17:33

Father Time

Even with all we've seen the last 10 years or so, it is still incredible (notice I did not say surprising) to me that the corporate media even spends time on this insignificant drivel. Things like this are on TV every day on every channel all across the world. This event should shock us?

There are two things about this I would find gut-wrenchingly funny if they weren't in actuality so darned sad...

1) CBS owns VIACOM owns MTV, who produced the halftime show - but yet, incredibly, this is being passed off as something no one knew was going to happen and we are expected to buy this. Maybe the women (or men as well, for that matter) can chime in on this one for me - do you often randomly wear silver spider shaped "pasties" under your everyday clothing? Do you wake up and say, "This feels like an arachnid-shaped-nipple cover day?" Is this a new trend? Am I missing out on an enjoyable new trend?

Are americans sheep?

2) Doesn't almost (if not every) NFL team have a squad of "Cheerleaders" who normally - independent of weather conditions, apparently - wear less clothing than Ms. Jackson, and dance far more suggestively? Who are used to promote everything from beer to automobiles? Who participate in things like the "Lingerie Bowl?" Do the NFL powers that be actually expect us to believe them when they sit there with a straight face and tell us they are "insulted" by this "crass" exhibition of apparent unrestrained sexuality?

Puh-leeeeezzzz...

At work today someone who didn't believe CBS knew the event was going to happen (a nice, yet media-misguided individual) said she just could not understand why they would want to "shoot themselves in the foot like this" with their watchers.

Trying to explain, I asked her when she had last heard the name "Janet Jackson" on TV or the radio prior to this event. She couldn't remember.

She still didn't get it.

Investigations 02.Feb.2004 18:10

Spudnuts

CBS chastises MTV.

Bush appoints panel to investigate himself.

Charles Manson appoints Squeaky Fromme to look into the whole murder thing.

Are there any Americans over the age of six who are put at ease by the ongoing "investigations" which consistently arrive at the conclusion that "all is well, continue to purchase hamburgers and Jim Carrey DVDs?"

I just ate the last fucking doughnuts in the house.

On the plus side, I have just appointed myself as Blue Ribbon Panel on Ongoing Pastry Related Activities Vis-a-Vis My Damn Self.

Results will be released to the general public June, 2011.

Or thereabouts.

give it up baby 02.Feb.2004 20:01

Eros

Little Mikey Powell needs to get laid.

No shit, man. 02.Feb.2004 21:12

joe

What's with the Powells, anyway? Both of them, Collin and Mike, are not un-attractive men, as far as I can assertain. Why are they so damn uptight?
Can some willing party please blow these poor bastards?

Ken Starr: "For the children" 02.Feb.2004 22:01

Spudnuts

>> Can some willing party please blow these poor bastards?

Ever the patriot, one man rises to accept his nation's call to duty.

http://www.swlink.net/~hoboh/foster/pages/cmn_img/starrBeforeHJC.jpg


Mr. ya-ya 02.Feb.2004 23:15

eyr

mojo filters
Powell's security chief is the definition of Sexual Tension
Powell's security chief is the definition of Sexual Tension

Is there no way to escape the Superbowl? 02.Feb.2004 23:53

uhg

As hard as I try, it seems that I can't escape the Superbowl. I don't care who won. I still don't know who played. I'm sure it was quite a spectacle to all the fans hopped up on viagra and booze for thier dumb sport. I know who Janet Jackson is, but I still don't know who the hell that Justin guy is. Where the hell did he come from? Why doesn't he go back there? What's with that fucked up look on his face?

As for CBS not knowing what was going on; it's not even the issue. They're responsible for the puke they show on TV. Breast or no breast, I wouldn't want to and expose my children to Janet Jackson and that Justin guy playing a game of checkers. I won't be able to escape them on c-span even. There is no end to what they'll do to take over precious real-estate in your mind and replace it with mindless sports related data. Stadiums, newscasts, clothing, music and perpetuating stupidity...everything is about turning people into mindless bully jocks who's only care is thier dumb game. Meanwhile, they get a bunch of these idiot jocks and pay them millions to play thier dumb games and the taxpayers always get the shaft by building them billion dollar stadiums, subsidizing a bunch of morons who play with bouncing balls. My dog can catch a ball, so fucking what.

Yes, It's Truly Shocking, Isn't It!!!! 03.Feb.2004 01:26

Rick

Here is an article about what Seattle Seagal Amber Lancaster was up to during the offseason last year.

Turning Up The Heat
4/24/2003
by Amber Lancaster

(Amber was one of the contestants on the "Are You Hot" TV show that aired on ABC for several episodes in February and March. While she may not have advanced to the finals or won the competition, she did come away with some interesting memories of the whole experience.)

Well, it all started when Sherri Thompson, our Sea Gals director, sent out an email to the squad saying there were going to be tryouts in Seattle for a TV show, and if any of us were interested to head on down. So a couple of the Gals and I went to the open auditions, not really expecting anything out of it, but just for fun. We really didn't know what the show was about since it hadn't been produced yet.

There were easily 500 people when we arrived at the site of the auditions. For the first round they took eight of us into a room and asked us intelligent questions like "Why do you think you're hot?", and so on. Then they went down the line and did a quick "yes - no" selection to weed out the first group.

For the next round they had us go into a room for a one-on-one session with the producer, and they asked me a bunch of questions on-camera for about 20 minutes. When I was done they told me I would hear back from them within the next couple of weeks.

A couple of weeks went by and I had kind of forgotten about it all, then suddenly I got a call from the casting director telling me I'm on my way to Los Angeles!

A week later I'm on the plane to LA to meet up with other contestants from the Northwest region, or "Hot Zone 3" as they called it on the show. It was actually Washington, Oregon, Idaho, Montana, Colorado, and parts of the Midwest. And there I was thinking to myself, wow, I've made it this far, and that's an accomplishment in itself.

The shows were all pre-taped, and before they aired I was not allowed to talk about them. We all had to sign confidentiality statements that we would say nothing until the results of the show had actually aired, or else they could sue me for 5 million dollars!

All the shows were shot one at a time. The first time we were in LA we stayed for five days, and then flew back down for three days to shoot the results of the internet vote. Then we flew home and turned around for the semifinals show. They were going to keep us there for two weeks until the final show aired on a Thursday, but that got pre-empted by the President's address to the country about Iraq. So we got to go home a little earlier.

We still had no idea what the show was about or the format, and for the first show we were paraded through one by one during a pre-judging process. The judges had pre-determined who would advance and who would be cut, and they had chosen eight men and eight women from our region to walk down the runway, and they would flash the "Hot" or "Not" sign to reveal who would get to move on.

They tried to make us feel like competitors against each other at the tapings, they didn't want us to be friends. We were basically kept in our hotel rooms all day under secret names. And it was even more strict as the rounds went on. The first show was more relaxed, even though they told us we couldn't talk to each other. My second trip to LA had us all in separate hotels where we were out of contact from each other, and my third time down for the semifinals again had us all in separate hotels.

We weren't allowed to leave our rooms and we were registered under false names. The producers didn't want any media contacting us, I guess. If we wanted to eat we had to order room service. It wasn't that much fun, to be honest. I had a lot of time alone to think, and they allowed us to work out, so I did a lot of that as well.

We didn't really know what was going to happen until literally that day. We didn't know we were going to be torn apart by the judges, we had no idea what the format of the show was. I was backstage waiting my turn and listening to what they were saying to the contestants, and I was starting to get a little terrified thinking they were going to rip me apart!

Then it was time for me to come out in my bikini, where the judges (Rachel Hunter, Lorenzo Lamas and Randolph Duke) would critique me on face, body, and sex appeal. I got some pretty high scores in all three categories, high enough to put me into the top four, anyway.

Rachel Hunter didn't like my hair, she thought it looked gray. It must have been the lighting or something, and it seemed like an odd comment to me.

I was really nervous going out there and expecting the absolute worst. Later I felt the judges kind of went easy on me compared to some of the things they were saying to the other people.

After I made it into the top four in my region it was up to the viewers at home to vote online for their favorites. I really didn't think I would make it much farther, and I wasn't expecting to make it into the top four in our region. I would have to wait a week to find out the internet results, and so I boarded the plane for home.

The next week I flew back to LA where they told me the internet results, and I was told I had won the internet voting for our region (thank you, Seahawks fans!) and I would be moving on to the semifinals.

That was a pretty big accomplishment, as I realized I had made it into the top eight in the country and would be competing with another girl in my zone against the top two girls from each of the other zones in the semifinal episode.

I think being a member of the Sea Gals and being in public helped my cause quite a bit on the internet vote. There were about 125,000 votes total for the semifinal voting, and I know I did place first in my region. So I definitely think it helped, since we have a lot of fans here in the Northwest.

I watched the shows all by myself in my hotel room. I think I did okay, although it's hard to tell because I was actually standing in front of the judges for quite a long time. They critiqued me for a good half an hour, and they cut that down to about a minute. Their comments seemed a little out of sorts, and I wasn't saying too much in response. Randolph Duke asked me if I could speak, and I said yes, I can speak! My name is Amber Lancaster! And then I talked about myself for a little bit. They didn't show that!

I made several interesting contacts as a result of my appearance on the show. Playboy was interested in photographing the finalists from the show. We were asked before it all began and I said no. That's definitely not in my future! The show did take us out to shoot publicity photos, including the ones you see here. I also got a call from a modeling agency in Boston, and they're working on some pretty big auditions that might lead to something nice. And I have an audition coming up to be a "Barker's Beauty" on The Price Is Right. There was also some nice publicity back home in the Northwest: I'm in the running in KJR Radio's "Bigger Dance" contest!

My appearance on the show wasn't anything that changed my life, I'm still the same person. I did make some new friends as a result of the show, and that's probably the best thing I got out of it.

Blow job 03.Feb.2004 07:38

Graywolf

Where'e what's her, she could earn her FCC knee's for this one and make them wish they'd had it done sooner!