MensNewsDaily.com, January 23, 2004
Okay. I'm a traditionalist. Mea culpa. But first let me set something straight (no pun intended).
For the record, I simply do not give a hoot about anyone's sexual preferences. If two consenting adults decide to engage in sexual activity -- no matter how bizarre or sordid it might be -- in the privacy of their own domicile, my opinion is that this is their business and their prerogative. If no one is being harmed or imposed upon unfairly, there is no reason for anyone to fuss about anything.
But since things in our society have now "progressed" far beyond this, I feel compelled to do exactly that. So fuss I shall...
In case you haven't been paying attention, there's a new phenomenon on the rise. It involves a generation of young -- and not so young -- heterosexual women who are engaging in open, public sexual behavior amongst themselves in an apparent response to the "cultural overdose of metrosexuality." Some call it the "Flexosexual Revolution," while I prefer a much simpler term -- "neolesbianism."
So what is neolesbianism, and how is this any different than the "run-of-the-mill" female "bi-curious" behavior? (And why am I in such a dither about it?)
Well, to begin with, this "new female sexuality" is all about one thing -- shock value. Or rather, it is about shocking people -- usually men -- for the sake of getting a response from total strangers. It is attention-seeking behavior at its most pathological. And it is just plain rude and crass.
Have you been "out on the town" recently? If you have, it is quite likely that you have seen straight women making out and groping each other at all of the hip clubs and lounges. As you scan the dance floor, you will see groups of young women in low cut jeans and skimpy tops bumping and grinding against each other and exchanging "Britney-Madonna" kisses while hordes of fellows egg them on. (Heck, if you're really "lucky," you even might stumble across a live filming of "Girls Gone Wild" -- starring that wonderful male role model, Snoop Doggy Dog.)
And you don't even have to go out to the clubs to be subjected to neolesbianism, either. Just turn on any local broadcast television station. In Newton Minnow's aptly-named "vast wasteland," you can tune in to any number of sit-coms or "reality-TV" shows where you are quietly likely to see the same thing. Just watch "Elimidate." And, if you are brave enough to turn on the evening news, you might even hear about how junior high school girls are charging male classmates $5 apiece to watch them make out with each other during recess.
Let's not even bring up what's being aired on cable TV.
So why should I be in such a spot of bother about all of this? After all, aren't these people just "being themselves" and "exercising their freedom of choice and expression"?
The short answer is no -- they are not exercising their freedom of choice and expression because they are imposing upon others with different value systems. In other words, they are not simply asking for the right to engage in the sexual expression of their choice. They are, quite conversely, forcing others -- total strangers nonetheless -- to vicariously experience their sexuality while demanding that these same strangers accept and condone such behavior. It is expecting respect without initially giving it.
Rather presumptuous, don't you think?
So why the sudden rise in neolesbianism?
I think it comes down to two factors. First of all, modern American women are much more sexually empowered now than they ever were in the past. They now have the complete freedom to express their sexuality in whatever manner they choose and with little to no reprisal.
Second, I think that a lot of American women have been brainwashed by the distorted messages they have been getting from Hollywood, television, and the various self-appointed "women's sexuality" experts of the last decade. Need proof? How about this:
- They watch "Kissing Jessica Stein" and conclude that when one is fed up with dating men, dating women is a much more elegant solution.
- They tune into "Sex and the City" or "Will and Grace" where gay men and women are hip and compassionate while straight men are boorish and slovenly.
- They read university "studies" which conclude that female-female relationships are much more intimate, nurturing, and emotionally fulfilling than male-female relationships.
- And they watch Britney Spears lip lock with Madonna and receive nothing but praise and reward for engaging in such a behavior.
It doesn't take a genius to realize how such warped views of male-female relationships can distort a person's thinking -- and can influence his or her actions.
Just so you don't think I'm pinning all of the blame on the fairer sex, I do agree with the supposition that neolesbianism (or whatever you chose to label it) is in many ways a response to the metrosexual contagion which has afflicted so many American men. In fact, I'm rather worried that these misguided fellows might follow suit with their own version of it.
Can you imagine legions of straight fellows bumping and grinding against each other on the dance floor in an effort to shock women into liking them -- or to at least succeed in getting their attention?
I shudder to think of such a possibility.
Steve Hernan is a healthcare executive and freelance writer living in Chicago.