PORTLAND, OR--According to witnesses, a giant mole dug a trench through a logging road leading to the Solo timber sale in the Mt. Hood National Forest last night. By chance, seasonal restrictions on the Solo sale ended today, meaning that logging could have started at any time in the morning. The trench, however, would have needed to have been filled in first, which would have slowed down the commencement of logging operations.
By chance, the road was also blocked in several other places by large piles of logs and brush, also seemingly placed in such a way as to block logging equipment. Witnesses did not finger the mole for these actions, and speculated that perhaps a freak windstorm had occured during the night, or that perhaps a giant desert beaver had struck as well.
Forest defenders, when contacted for a comment, said: "Holy shit, it was such a trip! I walked out this morning to take a leak, and I almost fell into this huge ****in' trench! That must've been one hella big mole!"
The controversial Solo timber sale was purchased by Freres Logging last summer. A tree-sit has graced unit 10 of the sale since that time, and a lawsuit was recently announced to prevent cutting there. Solo covers many acres of irreplaceable old-growth forest and many interests -- which apparently includes giant moles and beavers -- would like to see it spared the saws.