Colonialtown, MD - Americans rallied around President Bush after being snowed into their homes yesterday. A new NBCABCFOXNEWSVIACOMNYTIMESTNTNPRZOGBYCNNTIMEAOL poll shows Bush's approval rating at 98%.
"In times like this you've got to support the President", said Elmer Sack through a mouthful of Twinkie. "We need to put all our other problems on the back burner, and support the President's War on Snow".
In a conference call with snowed-in reporters, Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld
said the Pentagon had secured $940 billion in new funding to combat weather systems with new, space-age weapons.
"We will do whatever it takes to protect the American people from weather", Rumsfeld said. "We must be free to commute, and make no mistake - we will."