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All I Want(ed) for Christmas

Christmas Day -- Wednesday, December 25, 2002

I want to see the proof of weapons of mass destruction in Iraq before we engage in a war that will send tens of thousands of civilians to their deaths, enrage the Muslim world against us, grievously wound the American economy, and guarantee more terrorism here at home. I am sure the Bush administration's incontrovertible proof that these weapons exist is a sheaf of shipping manifests from roundabout 1984, when we sent the stuff to Saddam in the first place, but I want to see it anyway.

I want to hear about the endgame for our Iraq war. Who will rule in Saddam's place, and how will that person be an improvement? How will the Shiites and Kurds be represented and protected? How long will American forces have to be there? How much will it cost? Who gets the payout from the oil fields? How much of this war is based upon business decisions? Will we stop at Iraq, or will we move on to Syria, Saudi Arabia, Iran, and Egypt in the manner that Richard Perle has often envisioned?

I want to know what happened on September 11th, and why, and who messed up. This does not count as a gift - as a citizen, I am owed this, and so are you.

I want to know what was in the smallpox shot Bush got. Was it distilled water or Maker's Mark?

I want to watch John Ashcroft pet a calico cat with a big grin on his face.

I want to know how Jose Padilla and the Guantanamo detainees are celebrating the season. They are not Christian, true, but they are people being held like cattle with nary a mention of basic rights. Maybe someone could send them a fruitcake with the ACLU's telephone number frosted across the top.

I want a nationally known journalist - any journalist - to begin the process of calling the Bush administration to account for its dizzying malfeasance. Enron, Halliburton, Harken, Arthur Andersen, Eli Lilly, Carlyle and O my Lord how the money rolled in. I want the Fairness Doctrine's reestablishment to be a lynchpin policy goal for a Democratic candidate in 2004. I want my free press back.

I want to know where the anthrax killer is.

I want to know where Osama bin Laden is.

I want to know if the two of them are living in sin with Amelia Earhardt somewhere in the suburbs of Paris. We can bomb Paris, right? We can bomb anyone.

I want to know what happened to Paul Wellstone's airplane.

I want 55% of Americans to vote in the 2004 Presidential election. 55% is not such a big goal; only 50% voted in 2000, and something like 39% voted in the 2002 midterms. Let's shoot for a 55% I-give-a-good-damn quotient, America. What do you say? When you don't vote, the terrorists win - the foreign ones, and the domestic ones.

Finally, I want every single soul in the Bush administration to read the following lines. I want them to pay close attention to the words in bold:

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness."

This we call precedent, set by the Founders for all time in the Declaration of Independence. This we call our right as citizens.

Merry Christmas.
and... 30.Dec.2002 08:49


I want photos of Dick Cheney's newly redecorated rec room...er, undisclosed location. I bet theres a lot of crushed velvet.

The Clinton Presidential Library 30.Dec.2002 14:06

Bush Admirer

This demonization of GW Bush and the current administration is completely ridiculous. We've got a top guy in the White House and he's doing a great job.

Please take a moment to stroll down memory lane.

Office of the sponsoring committee, Denise Rich, Chairwoman

Clinton Presidential Library
Little Rock, Arkansas


I'm writing to you today as the chief fund raiser for the Clinton Presidential Library. The presidential library is slated to be built near Little Rock's River Market district on more than 17 acres of land. Construction is expected to cost about $80 million.

This library will have many firsts among the presidential libraries. Perhaps most striking will be a huge plastic statue of President Clinton located on the grounds in front of the library. The motorized statue changes color and position every ten minutes.

The main entrance is flanked and guarded by two larger-than-life statues of Arkansas State Troopers.

There is a central area in the lobby labeled "The Road to the White House." In it you will find memorabilia celebrating the important contributors and events leading to Clinton's election. There is a giant model of a Tyson Chicken with full supermarket wrappings and package labeling. There is an unlabeled photograph of a certain defunct savings & loan institution.

Inside there is a small auditorium where you can hear President Clinton's voice-overs of famous speeches. These include George Bush's speech about downsizing government, Dan Quayle's speech about family values, and a number of other speeches. The delivery is so good that the audience may actually believe they were Clinton's own speeches.

One lobby wall is lined with murals depicting President Clinton with famous Clinton quotes: "I didnt inhale," "I broke no laws of the United States," "I didn't lie," "I did not have sex with that woman", "The era of big government is over," from his State of the Union Address, January 23, 1996, and "I believe my pardon decision was in the best interest of justice," after he left office.

There is a display celebrating what is termed The Clinton Magic. There are some subpoenaed documents resting on a pillow. Viewers can push a button and watch the documents magically disappear and then reappear in another room in another building. Push another button and you can see Hillary Clinton win $100,000 in a cattle futures investment bonanza. There is a replica of Bill Clinton hooked up to a lie detector. When the viewer pushes a button it causes Bill to smile broadly and to tell a lie. When he lies the meter on the lie detector zooms up to the red zone. But if you look closely you will see that the label on the lie detector meter has a sticker on it that says: Presidents Approval Rating. Push the button again and youll notice the bigger the lie, the higher the rating.

The Clinton Agenda is depicted on another wall. There is a picture of Bill Clinton dressed up as Robin Hood. He is followed by a cadre of IRS agents dressed up as merry men. There is a video clip where the merry men accost citizens, confiscate their money, give the money to Bill, who in turn flings the cash out to a hungry mob of poor less-fortunates in exchange for their votes.

There is also a large mural of a campfire with a motto above it that says One People. Gathered around the campfire are individuals who have paired-up in groups of two and are arm in arm. There is a Palestinian and a Jew; a Hells Angel and a banker; a black and a white; an elder and a youth; two lesbians; etc. They all look happy. They all love one another. They all especially love Bill. If you look closely you can see that Kenneth Starr is tied to a stake in the middle of the campfire. Off to one side is a holding pen with with other captives awaiting execution. It looks like Henry Hyde and the House Republican prosecutors.

There are three wings off the lobby.

The first wing is a wax museum and named for the "Clinton Women." It houses life-size replicas of the President's fifty favorite conquests. These include Gennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Susan McDougal, Sally Perdue, Juanita Broaddrick, Lencola Sullivan, Connie Hamzy, Deborah Mathis, Elizabeth Ward, Jo Jenkins, Bobbie Ann Williams, and many more. There is even a likeness of Hillary Clinton at a very young age. The focal point is a lifesize replica of Monica Lewinsky wearing the actual semen stained dress from her White House Liaisons and holding a cigar. You will enter the wax museum through an impressive doorway designed to look like a huge zipper.

The second wing is extremely large and dwarfs the rest of the library. Patterned after the Louvre Museum in Paris, it is dubbed the "Clinton Scandals." This wing is so enormous that you must register before entering and it is recommended that you carry both food, water, and a backpack. Registration is required because you could get lost and require a search party. Soft soled shoes are recommended and you should allow a full day or a day and a half to tour this wing. There are too many exhibits to count and new ones are still being frequently discovered. It is a stroll down memory lane. You'll reminisce as you see familiar names including Jocelyn Elders, Vince Foster, John Huang, Dick Morris, Henry Cisneros, Travelgate, Filegate, The Lincoln Bedroom, Whitewater, Troopergate, Hubblegate, Fornigate, etc. If you wealthy you can hire James Carville to be your tour guide. James will explain the spin-doctored version of the scandals just as he did on Larry King's CNN show at the time.

The third and final wing is dubbed the "Clinton Achievements." It is a very small wing -- really more of a bay window than a wing. There is just one exhibit. It is a bronze statue of a soldier in drag. There is a small sign on the wall next to the statue that says, "Don't ask, don't tell."

If your contributions are substantial, there is a possibility of expanding the Achievements wing to add an exhibit that takes into account the recent paradigm shift in American moral values. The exhibit would show that: Smoking pot without inhaling is not smoking pot, and Oral sex is not sex. The exhibit would credit the President for these revisions to our standards: 1) Stealing less than $100 is not stealing, and 2) Gambling less than $1000 is not gambling, and 3) Drinking less than 10 drinks is not drinking, and 4) Handling less than 5 tricks a shift is not prostitution.

Your contribution is needed. Your name will be listed on the roll of contributors along with other esteemed contributors including the AFL/CIO, the Trial Lawyer's Association, the Government Employees Union, NOW, The Socialist Worker's Party, the Chinese government, Marc Rich, and the Reverend Farrakhan.

If you contribute more than $1,000 you will receive a pardon signed by William Jefferson Clinton himself. This will be an all-purpose pardon with a blank for you to fill in whatever crime you may have been accused of. You may pay with cash or credit card. If you pay by credit card your money will be laundered and deposited into a numbered Swiss account.

stop leaving long stupid posts. Bush admirer 30.Dec.2002 16:08

non-Bush admirer

If you are a reactionary idiot, there is no point in leaving such long posts on a leftist web-site. Nobody reads them. But I am grateful for the fact that you named yourself "Bush admirer," thus alerting me to the fact that I should skip whatever you posted. Thanks, "Bush admirer"!

Bush Admirer 30.Dec.2002 16:46

Has No F*cking Clue

Don't you get it? (Like I even have to ask that question.) It's not about Republicans vs. Democrats, or Bush vs. Clinton, it's about sending our people over to Iraq to die - for what? It's about more pain and suffering for the Iraqi people.

Did you know that since the Gulf War, infant mortality rates for Iraqi children after 5 declined 166%.

Do you know that because of the depleted Uranium we used in the Gulf War, Iraqi children are being born with birth defects never before seen in science? I'm talking about babies being born with noses over their eyes - children with tails. This is the legacy we've left them.

With this war, the Iraqi people will suffer even more than they already are. Yes, you can say that a lot of their suffering is caused by Saddam, but you can't overlook what we've done to them and how they feel about us.

There is only one thing that the Iraqi people hate more than Saddam - us. And whether you think that is justified or not, that is the truth. And hurting them even more - even if it will eventually "liberate" them, will deepen their hatred and suffering.

Perhaps you don't care, BA, because you live here, and you don't have to worry about your kids dying of leukemia (in Iraq, kids with that cancer have only a 3% chance of survival compared to 95% here), or where your next meal if going to come from, but these are very real realities for a lot of people.

You claim that Bush is doing a great job, but he has yet to provide ONE SHRED OF EVIDENCE that Iraq has WMD. Furthermore, even military higher-ups have come out and said that Bush's evidence is shaky at best.

Just because you don't give a fuck about the suffering the Iraqi people and can only focus on Clinton and his cum, don't peddle your hate around here.

I won't bother to waste my time on you anymore.

Furthermore, I encourage EVERYONE to quit responding to his (and Trilox's) senseless tirads. They are not worth our time.

it's a creul world 30.Dec.2002 16:57


It used to be that I wouldn't go to websights like this. I tried to avoid the harsh truth of what is our world today. But, sadly, I have to admit it. Both sides are guilty of this kind of back-handed manipulating. Those who side with Bush would like to ignore the fact that he used money soaked in the blood of other people's countries, and our own. They would like to ignore the fact that it was his own father who wagged us into a war in which we didn't belong in. I'm not ignoring what Clinton did, far from it. There has not been a president that honestly represents me as an American since I was born, and I'm 20 years old. That's pretty sad. I'm so glad someone actually had the guts to post a real christmas list, instead of one which ignores the way we live. Thanks for making web sights available for people like me who are looking for people who understand what it feels like to be betrayed by her own country.


Bush Admirer, 30.Dec.2002 17:51

Right-Wing Pinhead Troll

Keep posting!

By the way, I'm glad you enjoyed the Victor Davis Hansen piece I posted the other day.

"When I put my hand on the Bible, and I solemnly swear to faithfully uphold the Constitution of the United States, at the same time I will also pledge to restore honor and dignity to the Oval Office."

George W. Bush -- 2000 Campaign Stump Speech

He he he he.

everyone is CLUELESS 30.Dec.2002 18:08


I was out on the GODDAMN STREETS **EVERY TIME** Clinton bombed Iraq.

what I can't stand about the Internet is the Rush-Limbaughesque talk-show amateur hour armchair politics ("Bush this, Clinton that waaah . . .)

you are either FOR peace or AGAINST it.

you are either ANTI-CAPITALIST or a sheep.
everyone is CLUELESS
everyone is CLUELESS

Clueless one 30.Dec.2002 18:58

Bush Admirer

Dearest Clueless One:

This line of yours cracked me up:

"you are either ANTI-CAPITALIST or a sheep."

I hate to be the one to break the news to you, but Capitalism is the heart and soul of our society. Without Capitalism we are lost at sea with little hope for survival.

My heros are entrepreneurs who have built enterprises, created jobs, created products that people love, and who drive our economy and prove that the American dream is alive and well.

My anti-heroes -- the people I most detest -- are those whining and complaining losers who've never done a thing, and never will. Ramsay Clark, Noam Chomsky, Alan Dershowitz, Hillary Clinton, and Al Gore come to mind.

Try to see a chiropractor and ask him to work on getting your nose pointing approximately the same direction as your toes. As of now they're 180 degrees out of sync.
Clueless one
Clueless one

Correction 30.Dec.2002 19:48

Bush Admirer Hasn't A Clue

I said, "infant mortality rates for Iraqi children after 5 declined 166%"

I meant, "infant mortality rates for Iraqi children UNDER 5 INCREASED 166%"

I said, "don't peddle your hate around here."

I meant, "don't peddle your hate AND MINDLESS PATRIOTISM around here."


Clueless One 30.Dec.2002 20:16

Bush Admirer

Are you saying that infant mortality rates justify keeping a cruel tyrannical dictator in power? That's a weak argument.

Clueless one, I'm not peddling hate or mindless Patriotism. I'm simply advocating common sense.

When there is a butcher like Saddam, it makes no sense to defend him. He's the personification of evil.

GW Bush deserves a lot of credit for taking the bull by the horns and trying to clean up this mess before it gets out of hand.

Clinton did nothing during his eight years, and that made matters worse.

I don't have a life 30.Dec.2002 22:59

Moron Admirer

I love that little moron, I can't help it. He was doing great until Canda - and before that - Germany, blew the lid on him. Now everywhere I go, when I see his name I think 'moron.' But that's okay, because I used to get called that all the time too, and so I understand.

And I haven't yet figured out about how people don't even read my posts, but skip them and then attack me. But that seems to be all I understand. Gosh darn them! They should read about the little moron! He's my hero. Clinton was like a bad Santa compared to my moron!

Uh oh, the nurse is here for my shot! See all you peaceniks later! Another dose of my green medicine and then off to bed for me. It's a good thing Regan didn't get rid of ALL the . . . what are they called?

Indymedia Bush Admirer, patient #304 30.Dec.2002 23:17

Free Colon Brigade

Bush Admirer's colon 30.Dec.2002 23:56

Special Agent Deputy Dawg

BA, is that really what your colon looks like? Have you ever tried metamucil? Or even an occasional salad?

With regard to your list of anit-heroes:
"Ramsay Clark, Noam Chomsky, Alan Dershowitz, Hillary Clinton, and Al Gore"

To my knowledge, they're all capitalists except Chomsky who is syndicalist, which some would argue is still capitalist since technically the workers would have invested the capital to build and run their individual business.

Better bone up on your terminology if you want to play with your mental superiors, little buddy.

BA's BS 31.Dec.2002 16:13


Clinton Presidential Library hey any Library is YOUR enemy.