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Guerrilla anti-telemarketing revenge tactics

Jam the damn telemarketers!!! Got this from a friend. I love it, and thought it well worth passing along to the Portland IMC. So you all do your share now, ok?... Put 'em on hold!

I suppose some degree of commerce would grind to a halt if telephone solicitors weren't able to call people at home during the dinner hour.

But that doesn't make it any more pleasant. Now Steve Rubenstein, a writer for the San Francisco Chronicle, has proposed "Three Little Words" based on his brief experience in a telemarketing operation that would stop the nuisance for all time.

The three little words are "Hold on, please." Saying this while putting down your phone and walking off instead of hanging up immediately would make each telemarketing call so time consuming those boiler rooms would grind to a halt.

When you eventually hear the phone company's beep beep beep tone, you know it's time to go back and hang up your handset, which has efficiently completed its task. This might be one of those articles you'll want to e-mail to your friends.

Here's another idea:
When you get ads in your phone or utility bill, include them with the payment. Let them throw the stuff away. Think globally; act locally.

When you get those pre-approved letters in the mail for everything from credit cards to 2nd mortgages and junk like that, most of them come with postage paid return envelopes, right? Well, why not get rid of some of your other junk mail and put it in all in these cool little envelopes! Send an ad for your local chimney cleaner to American Express, or a pizza coupon to Citibank. If you didn't get anything else that day, then just send them their application back! Just make sure your name isn't on anything you send them. You can send it back the empty envelope, if you want, just to keep 'em guessing!

Let's turn this e-mail into a chain letter! Eventually, the banks and credit card companies will begin getting all their junk back in the mail. Let's let them know what it's like to get junk mail, and best of all...THEY'RE paying for it! Twice!

Let's support our U.S. Postal Service. They say e-mail is cutting into their business and that's why they need to keep increasing postage. We can help!

Pass this along to all your friends and maybe we could get enough business for the Post Office that they will not have to raise rates in 2004.

Pass it on!!

address: address: state of jefferson

have fun with 'em 16.Oct.2002 06:42

hangin up now

the other day when a telemarketer barged into our home via the phone my housemate started breathing heavy acting as if they bothered him in the middle of an "entaglement". They didn't stay on the phone long with him as his breathing increased and he was talking to "his lover".

Another friend of mine has fun with them by asking off the wall questions, like "At&T, What does that stand for?" Or once he was offered a "platinum" credit card and he acted as if they said "plutonium" and started telling them how dangerous the stuff is. Crazy stuff like that...I bet it makes their day more fun too. I mean imagine making those phone calls all day...

You've got to be kidding... 16.Oct.2002 13:01


"Let's support our U.S. Postal Service."

Are you crazy? The USPS is subsidizing this junk mail in the first place. Needless to say, its not "your" USPS anymore anyway, they claim to be a private company now. Thats why they still suck off the taxpayers money right?

telemarketing revenge 16.Oct.2002 14:29


All you have to do is get on the Oregon no-call list, which costs $3 per year. Then when they call you, you report them to the State and they have to pay a $25,000 fine.

Pretty soon they won't call you any more. I personally busted about 10 of these assholes, and got a letter from the state saying they had been fined, and now I haven't had any calls for at least 2 years.

usps - NO tax money 17.Oct.2002 03:27


trilox, you got it half right.

YES, the usps certainly bends over backwards to help businesses waste paper and our time by encouraging (in a big way) junk mail.

but NO, the usps does NOT get any taxpayer money -- it is fully supported by its "services" (see above), since 1982. [usps reference]

however, i dont much think they are any kind of heroes, cuz the stupidity of the the first fact far outweighs the second fact.

other side of the pond 09.Jul.2003 16:38


guess you guys over the pond have the same problem with pain in the ass cold callers and junk mail as we do so I will certainly pass this onto a few friends not so much to help our postal service who are going under coz it takes them a week to deliver a letter if they dont decide to steal it....but coz its damn funny.
ez peeps