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Zipperists Infiltrate Laughing Horse Sustainer Party

The Laughing Horse Book Collective has long been a modern-day casablanca for the infighting factions of the revolutionary and not-so-revolutionary left. Not so on Sunday, September 23rd! At approximately 9:30 PM, a key member of the local Zipperista faction made their way into the front door...
The Laughing Horse Book Collective has long been a modern-day casablanca for the infighting factions of the revolutionary and not-so-revolutionary left. Not so on Sunday, September 23rd! At approximately 9:30 PM, a key member of the local Zipperista faction made their way into the front door of the collective in what witnesses would describe later as "a flurry of whirling zippers". The person then made her/his way around the room, luring nearly everyone present into the arms of the Zipperist Party with promise that, once successful, they will "zip it up". Within moments and to 90% of the attending crowd, she/he had distributed blue, black, and grey zippers, and with them, the Zipperist craze.
This is not the first sighting of Zipperist agitators in Portland. One recalls the incident at Reed College last week in which four security guards were completely tied up with zippers, one sporting a large paper diaper which, when removed and unfolded read "The Zipperistas Will Zip It All UP!" Since then, there has been a seemingly endless stream of turmoil from the rank and file of this otherwise unknown and enigmatic group.
What is the International Zipperist Party? Who are these Zipperistas? What do they want? These are some of the many questions folks have in the face of our new concern, with only the cold, harsh sound of a sliding steel clasp in answer.
war contributions 23.Sep.2002 08:21

Art Heist

war contributions
war contributions

Zipperists are a YKK front 23.Sep.2002 09:54

zon

Do not be fooled, the Zipperists are a front for YKK! They are, in fact, an elite counter-intelligence group for that very same zipper multinational that enslaves children to work in the Indonesian zipper factories.

ZON=WRONg 23.Sep.2002 14:02

Johannes Azipperist johann-@excite.com

ZON is a counter-revolutionary; don't believe the hype!

YKK is a eastern european revolutionary anarcho-zipperist movement.

YKK stands for Yoi Kibble-Krafternwerk which when loosly translated means Underground Party of Revolutionary Zipperists.

THE REVOLUTION WILL NOT BE BUTTONED.

Zip on comrades!

We will overcome... 23.Sep.2002 16:10

zip zipopovitch clamydia@mail.com

Don't be discouraged, comrades. We will ZIP IT ALL UP in spite of disparaging and antagonistic comments from dirty outsiders! Let the revolution ZIP!

A Zipperista Pledge 23.Sep.2002 22:20

Jack the Zipper

Last night at the Laughing Horse benefit I happened upon a vibrant member of the Zipperista party. Unlike most party representatives, this one wasn't full of hot air or empty promises, but rather a handful of zippers in an array of colors. Inspired by this gracious gesture, I am now a card-carrying member and have written a pledge upon which to found this movement.

I pledge alliegence to the zipper
of the un-united page of IndyMedia
and to the pants
for which they withstand
one sliding tab
under rows of teeth
IndyZippable
with freedom and zippers for all